29 Mar 2013
in Baby, blogger, child, gratitude, inspiration, Life, lyrics, Mother, Parenting, poetry, Winter Park, Writing
Tags: baby, endless, love, mindfulness, mommy, motherhood, poem, poetry, unconditional, winter park, Writing
*This poem is dedicated to Olivia Daisy. She is my cheerful, creative, sweet, intuitive and strong-willed 18 month old baby girl. I love you cupcake.
I never knew
Just how much
You would mean to me.
How your eyes
Would touch a deep place
In my soul.
A place that I didn’t know existed.
I never knew
That when I looked at you,
The world would stand still.
That time wouldn’t matter.
That nothing mattered but you.
I never knew that I could love someone
That I would do anything for you.
I never knew that you would steal my heart
With one look
Your first word
Your first walk
Your first kiss
Your first hug
Your first goodbye
Your first hello
I never knew,
Love could be this endless.
Now I know.
20 Feb 2013
in Acting, audition, blogger, career, child, Cooking, gratitude, inspiration, Life, Mother, Parenting, Winter Park, Writing
Tags: acting, actress, artist date, audition, Blogger, child, cooking, florida, julia cameron, mindfulness, Music, parenting, shopping, Singer, winter park, Writing
The day after yesterday. I just felt like saying that, not sure why. Today is day 43 and I am going strong! I’m feeling ambitious about creating the life I desire. Life is good.
Highlights for today:
* I managed to cook three meals this morning while watching my baby girl play. Not sure how it happened but it did. I prefer to cook several meals at once, freezing a few; rather than cooking each day.
* Olivia was a hands full today. She kept me guessing (literally). All day I asked her “What’s wrong?”, “What do you want?” “Tell mommy, what do you want?” “Do you want this?” ”Do you want that?”
And Olivia’s response: No (in the sweetest voice) followed by a sobbing cry (not so sweet). It didn’t seem possible to appease her today. Poor baby, she just wants to communicate and is so frustrated with me for not understanding her.
* I managed to go clothes/shoe shopping for Olivia this afternoon. This was no small feat. And man, were they right about that saying “It takes a village to raise a child.” I was wishing a village came with me shopping today. Liv gave me a run for my money this afternoon. But mommy kept her cool, gave Liv many kisses and managed to complete the shopping trip. What helped? Snacks, smiles, hugs, toys (and when I say toys, that means anything that is kid friendly, even a cup or straw will do).
Today was all about productivity because tomorrow is my “artist date”. Artist date is just a fancy word that means we “take ourselves on a date by doing what we love, creating art”. So tommorow after my daughter goes to school; I write music, sing and seek the latest auditions for acting. Sometimes I will do something relaxing to invoke my creative spirit to come out and play. There is a great author named Julia Cameron who wrote a series of books geared towards artists. Check out her books at http://juliacameronlive.com/.
Be Well and goodnight,
07 Feb 2013
in Acting, audition, Baby, blogger, career, Life, Mother, Parenting, Winter Park, Writing
Tags: acting, actor, audition, disney, florida, gratitude, mindfulness, motherhood, tampa, Writing
Day 30, what can I say? You threw out small tests and I manged to pass them. Yes, life lessons.
There were unexpected surprises and minor challenges. Yet, I woke up and said ” Life, what do you have in store for me today? It will be a great day!” And thankfully, it turned out to be a good day, not great, but good. There is so much to be thankful for.
Highlights for today:
* I survived many baby tantrums. I’m starting to get a handle on how to better manage a tantrum. Distraction by laughing, dancing and singing tends to help Liv calm down and refocus.
* I prepared for Disney audition, which is tomorrow. I have never auditioned for a Disney commercial before so I am very much looking forward to it!
* I bought make up today (a light foundation, commonly used for television) and a very kind saleswoman said this to me:
” Just go be a princess on that Disney commercial and whatever you do, don’t worry.” She continued with ” Just like a job interview, go in there and be your confident self.” It was like she knew me and was reading my thoughts. A real life angel. Thank you to the kind stranger who brightened my day. Ironically, she worked at Disney for many years.
* I am making every effort to do at least one kind gesture, out of the blue, for someone each day. It feels really good and I believe in the law of attraction.
And with that, good night. I really want to write more to you dear blog and bloggers; but this lady is VERY tired. Plus I need my rest in order to magically transform into the best princess actress Disney can ask for. LOL
03 Feb 2013
in Baby, blogger, healing, Mother, Orlando, Parenting, Winter Park, Writing
Tags: baby, family, fatigue, Fun, mindful, orlando, parenting, Relax, Science Center, sleeping, Sleepy
I thought Sundays were for sleeping and recovering from a busy week. But instead it’s Saturday and I really needed my sleep. I woke up exhausted and couldn’t brush off that feeling. So around noon, when our daughter went down for a nap; I did too. Not even the train (a very loud train which passes almost hourly in Winter Park) could wake me up. Mommy really needed that sleep.
Here are my highlights for today.
* I slept! Hallelujah!
* We went to the Science Center. It was family time this afternoon. My husband and I enjoyed living vicariously through our daughter’s joy for a few hours. The Orlando Science Center has a lot to offer for kids of walking age. However, as my hubby so gently put it; it doesn’t have a whole lot to offer for us. The biggest gift though is watching Olivia learning and squealing with excitement upon discovering new toys. Her favorite attraction today was the water fountain and water play table. Lets just say, I am glad we brought her an extra change of clothing. To learn more about the Orlando Science Center, check it out. http://www.osc.org/
You can get a family pass and it’s reciprocal. This basically means that you can go to other museums and Science Centers, in various cities around the country.
* I survived another day of many tantrums!
* I am writing a blog entry this evening instead of sleep=I kept the promise to myself to write a blog each day (or at least most days)
* No music goal today. The only goal was to sleep. And after I slept, I was in such a better mood.
And with that, goodnight and sweet dreams to all.
01 Feb 2013
in gratitude, healing, Life, Mother, Parenting, Singing, Winter Park, Writing
Tags: baby, gratitude, grief and loss, group therapy, mindful, motherhood, Music, winter park, Writing
Day 24 what do you bring? Olivia and I woke up an hour later than usual. We went out with friend last night for dinner. Thankfully Liv slept well because I was worried about changing her schedule last night. She went to bed an hour later than usual. But she is a trooper and although I believe in routine for babies and children; I think babies are resilient and more flexible than we give them credit. And they are such wise souls.
* I managed to survive a day in which our sweet baby girl threw a record number of tantrums. I’m sure many mothers out there will understand what I mean by saying this. There is a moment (or two, or three) where I thought “Mommy needs a time out!” But I maintained composure while singing every children’s song I could remember. When this did not work, I would try to distract her with favorite toys. And when this did not work, I had to laugh. Sometimes the laughing works, and Olivia will laugh too. Today was not one of those days. Personally I believe in positive redirection. She is just trying to communicate her feelings but does not yet have all the verbal skills to do so.
* Music Goal today was to write another song. I began to write a love story this morning. It is in the works. Please stay tuned.
* As for the boxes (if you haven’t read my previous blogs, we relocated from home to a condo recently)- the boxes are growing fewer by the day. I was able to get rid of two boxes. Yahoo!
* The night ended with a group. I lead grief and loss groups for adults. My heart goes out to every individual in the group room, each time I lead groups. People are more resilient than they know; but it doesn’t make grief any easier. We all heal in our own way, our own process of grieving. Every night when I leave group, I am fortunate to go home to my daughter and husband. I pray that we are safe on a daily basis because life is fragile. These groups have taught me many lessons. My daughter squealed with joy when she saw me. I walked into our condo and quietly tiptoed in her direction. She noticed me and we ran to one another like long-lost friends. It was the most precious moment.
Smell the flowers
And with that, farewell until tomorrow, as I am tired from a day of joy, mommyhood and counseling.
27 Jan 2013
in blogger, child, Florida, gratitude, Life, lyrics, Mother, Orlando, Parenting, Singing, sports, Winter Park, Writing
Tags: baby, charity, child, healing, health, orlando event, running, Science Center, Seasons 52, Toddler, Track Shack, wellness, winter park event
I wanted to sleep in on Saturday morning and rest after a week of battling a cold; but it was not in the cards. I was awakened to the singing of the Star Spangled Banner and a lady yelling over an intercom off Park Avenue in Winter Park, Florida.
Seasons 52 Fresh Grill and Wine Bar celebrated the enjoyment of living a fit and healthy lifestyle by sponsoring a race through Winter Park early Saturday morning.
Proceeds benefited the Boys & Girls Clubs of Central Florida and the Joe R. Lee Branch in Eatonville and the Track Shack Foundation. For more information on Track Shack and upcoming races, check out this link.
On a different note, although I was slightly annoyed to hear the loud singing and hollering of the hostess; I knew it was most likely for a good cause. Also I felt it was a sign for me to get my day going. Saturday was filled with a walk to the Winter Park Farmers Market, dancing with my daughter to music videos and a trip to the Science Center. We went to the Science Center once before but this time is different because she can actually walk. A lot more fun for her and great exercise for me.
My music homework this weekend was to watch as many interviews and music videos by artists I admire. More on this to report in next blog.
On Sunday (today) my daughter and I went to the Science Center again. Our trip yesterday morning was cut short so I decided to take Olivia to the Kids Center there again today. Liv’s enthusiasm was contagious and despite my sore throat; I had a good time too. Liv surprisingly liked playing on a tractor the most. She also made us lunch. Lunch consisted of a fake carrot, pineapple juice, pizza, bread and a slice of cheese. So sweet of her! Overall, I can’t complain because it turned out to be a great weekend.
Olivia on tractor!
- Science Center
19 Jan 2013
in Baby, career, child, Florida, gratitude, healing, Life, Mother, Orlando, Parenting, Singing, spirituality, Winter Park, Writing
Tags: actor, artist, family, joy, life, mindfulness, motherhood, Music, Singer, songwriting, spirituality, wellness, writer
Today is Day 11, my lucky number !!! What follows is a synopsis of my day. Our sweet baby girl has been under the weather since Wednesday evening. So mommy and daddy have been busy taking good care of her. Today I took Liv to our first appointment with a new pediatrician who is an MD but also skilled in Alternative Medicine. It is such a relief to find a pediatrician who believes in empowering families through prevention, education and support.
I visited my favorite business for skin care this evening. It is called The Sanctuary of Winter Park. The owner/founder is Usha Naran who is also a friend of mine. She is such a professional, kind and genuine individual. I admire her as a specialist in skin care and as a person. She specializes in facials, waxing and make up. Also there is a wonderful lady there named Maria who is very talented and is also a friend of mine. Maria provides many services including waxing and pedicure/manicure. I see Maria for eye brow waxing and always leave happy! Check out this peaceful Sanctuary that is well-known for skin care in Winter Park.
I could go on and on about my day, but don’t want to bore you today. First and foremost, today was about taking care of our bambina (spanish for “baby girl”). We also ran a few errands together. The process of organizing, decluttering and unpacking is taking longer than anticipated. Olivia keeps me laughing when life can be so serious.
I am beginning to truly miss lyric writing, acting, singing and dancing. Mostly I miss singing, and acting. I have the acting bug again! So I am hopeful that next week will be the last week of serious organization mode; so I can concentrate on acting/music again. I sing and write now but not to the extent of my soul’s purpose. There are many changes being made on a personal and professional note; which are preparing me for this next phase.
17 Jan 2013
in Baby, blogger, career, child, Cooking, gratitude, Life, Mother, Orlando, Parenting, Winter Park, Writing
Tags: artist, healing, health, joy, life, mindfulness, mother, motherhood, wellness, writer, Writing
My daughter Olivia Daisy carried her cookie with her to take a bath this evening. Olivia rushed to the tub as soon as she heard daddy twist faucet on. She then proceeded to climb over the tub fully clothed. I intervened, quickly removing clothing and getting her into her favorite duck for bath time fun. Once in the duck, she watched the crumbs of her cookie fall into the water. It was a candid moment. I urged my husband to grab a camera stating ” Olivia wants her duckie and cookie too!”
Surprisingly, Olivia did not eat her cookie, but merely starred in awe of the crumbs floating away. Finally, after some prompting; she began eating the cookie while enjoying her bath. I began to wonder the metaphor/meaning of this joyful event. Perhaps the crumbs floating away, remind us of mindfulness. It is important to really be present, even while enjoying/eating food. Liv wanted her cookie and her bath. Perhaps a metaphor for how all is possible in life. A broad generalization, maybe, but I am choosing not to analyze. I think about how I want to be a mom and career woman: the delicate balance between both. My daughter inspires me more than I could ever have imagined. If you look closely at picture below you can see our cookie monster. Cookie in her left hand and crumbs on bottom of duckie bath.
And here is a brief synopsis of the earlier part of my day. This morning while my daughter was at school; I had a few hours to cook, organize and relax. Mostly I cooked dinner like a “crazy person”. I basically stayed hyper focused on the task of cooking. By doing so, with minimal distraction; I cooked two meals and managed to cook Olivia her favorite oatmeal for tommorow’s breakfast. Then with the last forty-five minutes; I decided to relax while listening to a guided meditation on YouTube. It was called the Universal Mind Meditation by Kelly Howell. There was one quote that really stood out. As I lay still the soft tone whispered, “I’m not the past, present or the future, I simply am.” I felt restored, even after just 20 minutes of listening to guided meditation. I adore Kelly Howell’s work and truly believe in our brain’s potential and power to envision change, and to heal through guided imagery.
Tonight I led a group for adults grieving the death of a loved one. It was a great group of individuals and I always leave group feeling purposeful and with immense gratitude. After group, it was all family with laughter and yummy home cooked food. What more can we ask for?
11 Jan 2013
in Baby, blogger, career, child, gratitude, Life, Mother, Orlando, Parenting, psychology, Winter Park, Writing
Tags: artist, baby, family, health, life, mindfulness, mother, multitasking, writer
It is time for bed and I am staying loyal to my promise of writing a blog each day for sixty days. So my blogs will vary in content and please excuse a blog every now and then, which may not be fulfilling. Today is one such blog. Thursdays are my busiest days because I schedule most appointments, run errands and work as full-time mommy. And on Thursday evenings I lead support groups for grieving adults. Today was productive, and I truly enjoy running groups about grief and loss. After leaving group, I feel truly blessed and fortunate to support and empower others, while also learning a great deal from families. It is a very rewarding job.
That is the part of my day I truly enjoyed. The part I did not was the hour and half wait at doctor’s appointment today. The longest I have ever waited for a doctor’s appointment was two hours and 15 minutes. This was close. But I was very grateful to my Aunt who watched my daughter while I attended the appointment. She was understanding when I speed texted “I may be late, doctor is late. Is that okay?” To which my Aunt responded, “Take your time. Even go shopping if you want to.” I then sighed and texted, “I wish, but I am here waiting.” Today was a test in patience.
At the end of the day, I am thankful for another day with purpose, love and support. I am grateful for this blog. And I am excited about the journey ahead, a leap of faith. Day 4 is pretty darn good! And to that sentiment, good night, as I am one very tired mommy at the end of an “on the go” day.
09 Jan 2013
in Baby, blogger, child, Florida, Life, Mother, Orlando, Parenting, psychology, Winter Park, Writing
Tags: artist, baby, joy, mindfulness, motherhood, Music, writer, Writing
What a beautiful day in Winter Park it is, minus the overcast skies. Here is a picture of Park Avenue this morning.
This week is all about organization. So after walking my daughter to school this morning, I began reviewing my “to-do” list. Where to begin, I wondered. I looked around at our condo, which has been seriously “babyfide”. This is my new word for “the baby has taken over.” Its all good though, because it reminds me of just how much fun she is having. After vacuuming, sweeping, organizing and de-cluttering; it was like a new condo. Then I realized the tedious, boring nature of cleaning up, so I put on my favorite songs from lists saved on iTunes. Music rejuvenated me and I continued to organize. Two quotes popped out at me from paperwork I was sorting through. These were quotes I wrote down from awhile back. I thought I’d share them with you today.
“To be surprised, to wonder, is to begin to understand.” Jose Ortega and Gasset
“You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” Eleanor Roosevelt
“If anything can go well, it will.” Unknown author
Wishing you a beautiful day! Listen to your heart, and trust in your own connection to you.
Be Well, Kimberly