Lately the word “Acceptance” has been on my mind. I hardly feel like writing tonight as I am one busy mommy and entrepreneur these days. But I miss writing to you, my blogger friends. So yesterday I started pondering over how I am feeling, as many artists do. The words that popped up in my mind are “gratitude and acceptance”. As I have written in previous blogs; I have been feeling immense gratitude for the people, things and places that fill up my heart and mind. The book “The Magic” has inspired me like never before. However, the word “Acceptance” took me by surprise.
So I asked myself, “Where is this word coming from?” The answer: I accept who I am today, not tomorrow. I have spent a great deal of time planning my future and daydreaming. I’m a big believer in futuristic thinking but sometimes people get stuck in either the past or future. I began to feel stuck in the future, not knowing how to be present minded. Still-I am working on being more mindful each day.
The future is now. As I made plans for the future; I also began to feel stuck in the mindset of ”why aren’t my dreams happening sooner? and I will be happy when….” How many of you have felt this way? So I realized I have been living for the future. Although I have been making strides towards my goals of being an actor, singer and writer; it was never good enough. So I asked myself, ” What can I do now to be happy?” What can I do, while pursuing my dreams that will be a “muse” to my creative ideas?
The entrepreneur in me has come up with a vision. I look forward to sharing this plan with you, as soon as it is copyrighted.=) So back to the word “Acceptance.” I’m learning to accept that I am always going to be the “type” to want a job that is spontaneous, creative and in a healthy, happy environment. After browsing the internet about the word “Acceptance.”, I found a few quotes that inspired me and would like to share with you tonight.
“To be given permission to be confused — and remain confused — for as long as it takes would have been a huge gift.”
― Janet Jackson, True You: A Journey to Finding and Loving Yourself
“In life one has a choice to take one of two paths: to wait for some special day – or to celebrate each special day.”
― Rasheed Ogunlaru
The price tag that you put on your soul will determine the people and circumstances in which you find yourself.”
The Magic has begun! If you did not read my previous blog, allow me to bring you up to date. I have been reading “The Magic” by Rhonda Byrnes. It is truly inspiring me to do more, be more, share more. I highly recommend this book, if you haven’t already figured that out. LOL. Anyways, I miss writing to you; my invisible blogger and fans.
So here is the latest on my artistic journey, in case you are wondering. I have been researching the top recording studios in Central Florida. So far I have narrowed my search to a select few. This week I will be touring facilities and making a decision about where to record the latest song (a co-write). Please stay tuned, as I will be posting this song. Also, I am preparing for next open Mic night in College Park. Although I am not a professional guitarist; I will be attempting to learn as many chords, and strum like crazy for the next two weeks in order to be ready for open Mic. I have vowed that if I do not feel confident in my amateur guitar skills; nothing will stop me from singing. So, I will be singing Acapella.
“Come hell or high-water” (I think that is how the saying goes; I will continue to push forward with my singing/acting and entrepreneurship. This journey has not been an easy one as I have been challenged by adversities. However, it is the resilience, determination and passion which I truly feel will lead me in best direction and create success along the way.
It is the journey not the final destination that really matters after all. I’m enjoying the small moments, the precious ones with our daughter Olivia and being grateful for this life. I’m truly grateful for you, my invisible readers. Although I cannot see you; I know you exist. Thanks for your comments and feedback.
I am reading this awe-inspiring book called ” The Magic” by Rhonda Byrnes. It from the series of books beginning with The Secret, then “The Power” and now “The Magic” regarding the Law of Attraction. There is a paragraph at start of first chapter which truly captures the essence of “The Magic”.
It reads “I am here to tell you that the magic you once believed in is true, and it’s the disillusioned adult perspective of life that is false. The magic of life is real and it’s as real as you are. In fact, life can be far more wondrous than you ever thought it was as a child, and more breathtaking, awe-inspiring, and exciting than anything you’ve seen before. When you know what to do to bring forth the magic, you will live the life of your dreams. Then, you will wonder how you ever could have given up in believing in the magic of life!”
The key discussed at the start of this book. And I say “start” because I have just begun reading this book. The key is one word: Gratitude. Yes, many of us daily give thanks for “our bread”, friends, family and say thank you to the stranger who kindly opens the door. However, the author challenges us to give an abundance of thanks with intention and regularly. There is a 28 day journey to bring forth the magic into your life by gratitude detailed in the book. The book also provides activities to increase gratitude.
So I want to say a big THANK YOU to Rhonda Byrne and the team that created this book “The Magic”. Why? Because the more I give; the more magical my life becomes. As Willie Nelson (singer-songwriter) quotes ” When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around.” I have been aware of gratitude and believe I am a grateful person. However, I can be doing so much more to express gratitude and give back.
I hope that this blog inspires you, the reader, to continue your journey of attracting magic to your life. Give, give, give!!!
Not much to say about Day 60. Why? Because I survived through another day of being sick. Last night I checked into an urgent care clinic for what I thought was the Flu. But thankfully, it turned out to be a bad cold and ear infection. Still I felt miserable. There were a few things/people who deserve honorable mention for their support.
A special thanks to my mom, dad, Art (my husband), Olivia (daughter) and to Glee.
GLEE (the show) really helped me survive while being sick. I was able to catch up on a few episodes and I’m always inspired by this show to continue shooting for the moon (my dreams). And of course a special thanks to my sisters and friends for your text messages which rooted for me to recover.
Day 60 marks my goal for 60 posts, in sixty days. Overall I have 111 posts (my lucky number “11″). I’m excited about this journey because I am creating the life I have always dreamed of, except now I am actually putting my thoughts into action. So from here on out, I will only be posting blogs about a personal journey of becoming the artist I always imagined. We are all children at heart. And now I am talking directly to you, fellow blogger and/or viewer. You can tap into your “element” and bring your inner child to life. Do what you love to do! Thanks for supporting and following me on this journey.
Day 58 wasn’t so great. Day 59, you take the cake. Not a good cake.
That is my attempt at humor while drowning in tissues with mild grade fever, sore throat, body aches etc…
So I thought, what will I post for this day? And the only thing that came to my mind was the song “Staying Alive.” I kept thinking” ha, ha, ha, ha stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive…ha ha ha”
So here are some lyrics from this song below.
Lyrics from Bee Gee’s “Staying Alive”
Whether you’re a brother or whether you’re a mother
So I thought of this great quote I wanted to post about Day 58, before Day 58 came along. The day dragged on and I began dragging along. Here is the quote below.
“Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away.”
Then Day 58, took my breath away, literally. Why? Because I am battling a very bad cold. Cold +asthma= no fun.
So that is all I have to say about Day 58, go away…come back a happier day!
I thought Sundays were for sleeping and recovering from a busy week. But instead it’s Saturday and I really needed my sleep. I woke up exhausted and couldn’t brush off that feeling. So around noon, when our daughter went down for a nap; I did too. Not even the train (a very loud train which passes almost hourly in Winter Park) could wake me up. Mommy really needed that sleep.
Here are my highlights for today.
* I slept! Hallelujah!
* We went to the Science Center. It was family time this afternoon. My husband and I enjoyed living vicariously through our daughter’s joy for a few hours. The Orlando Science Center has a lot to offer for kids of walking age. However, as my hubby so gently put it; it doesn’t have a whole lot to offer for us. The biggest gift though is watching Olivia learning and squealing with excitement upon discovering new toys. Her favorite attraction today was the water fountain and water play table. Lets just say, I am glad we brought her an extra change of clothing. To learn more about the Orlando Science Center, check it out. http://www.osc.org/
You can get a family pass and it’s reciprocal. This basically means that you can go to other museums and Science Centers, in various cities around the country.
* I survived another day of many tantrums!
* I am writing a blog entry this evening instead of sleep=I kept the promise to myself to write a blog each day (or at least most days)
* No music goal today. The only goal was to sleep. And after I slept, I was in such a better mood.
Day 24 what do you bring? Olivia and I woke up an hour later than usual. We went out with friend last night for dinner. Thankfully Liv slept well because I was worried about changing her schedule last night. She went to bed an hour later than usual. But she is a trooper and although I believe in routine for babies and children; I think babies are resilient and more flexible than we give them credit. And they are such wise souls.
Today’s Highlights
* I managed to survive a day in which our sweet baby girl threw a record number of tantrums. I’m sure many mothers out there will understand what I mean by saying this. There is a moment (or two, or three) where I thought “Mommy needs a time out!” But I maintained composure while singing every children’s song I could remember. When this did not work, I would try to distract her with favorite toys. And when this did not work, I had to laugh. Sometimes the laughing works, and Olivia will laugh too. Today was not one of those days. Personally I believe in positive redirection. She is just trying to communicate her feelings but does not yet have all the verbal skills to do so.
* Music Goal today was to write another song. I began to write a love story this morning. It is in the works. Please stay tuned.
* As for the boxes (if you haven’t read my previous blogs, we relocated from home to a condo recently)- the boxes are growing fewer by the day. I was able to get rid of two boxes. Yahoo!
* The night ended with a group. I lead grief and loss groups for adults. My heart goes out to every individual in the group room, each time I lead groups. People are more resilient than they know; but it doesn’t make grief any easier. We all heal in our own way, our own process of grieving. Every night when I leave group, I am fortunate to go home to my daughter and husband. I pray that we are safe on a daily basis because life is fragile. These groups have taught me many lessons. My daughter squealed with joy when she saw me. I walked into our condo and quietly tiptoed in her direction. She noticed me and we ran to one another like long-lost friends. It was the most precious moment.
Smell the flowers
And with that, farewell until tomorrow, as I am tired from a day of joy, mommyhood and counseling.
Singer, Writer
Kimberly Beaman
